Spent too much time trying to take care of the details that I neglected to construct a perspective-correct background, and I only have myself to blame. ==
I really need the critiques and suggestions of y'all here, maybe a demonstration of the right perspective plan.
One of my college mates already pointed out alot, but I also want to know what more that this pic needs correcting/lacks/just plain sucks about.
- ill point out the jarring probs. your pilot dude at the back has a overly high waist when compared to the dude next to him. Proportion wise they seem short.
- Nice job on the boobs but make sure you render the suit better, the posing of the girl is on the stiff side of things because her shoulder and waist are too aligned (straight)
- the horizon line is also a bit off. You got people in the bg standing in werid places. your bg seems to be viewed from a low angle but three foregorund and midground characters are more of a normal eyeline
- basically just lack of reference xD.. i mean collect reference for poses and pictures. Check other artists with similar scenes and see how they handle perspective problems and juggle multiple elements in a shot. Kekai or Dociu would be good. Some of craig mullins work have shots with lots of people. A pros work is close to perfect and dissecting it for study would be better than winging it on your own. nothing beats photography tho
Give me no mercy, people. Just the cold, hard truth.
Really wish buddies gave me critiques like that in college.
You understand your problems, really. The question is what to do about it, and honestly- in order to put them in proper perspective you're going to want to re-draw everything. While you're doing that you really should pay attention to your anatomy and use references. All of these problems could have been avoided with proper planning and critical thinking about your work, don't just jump in next time. Yay for learning experiences ?
Yeah be sure to give a crit back to your buddy
It looks like you just need to take a perspective class. I took two classes of perspective and it really paid off. The first one was quite rigid--we learned the basics and did structures mostly. In my advanced perspective class tho, we did only figures practically and how they related to each other. We learned how to cheat perspective and bend the rules. If your school offers a class for perspective, take it.
You don't need to redo everything--you just need to learn how to make all those figures relate to the same horizon line. Generally speaking for your image, since we're not looking up or down, then we're looking at the horizon line. If we're looking at the HL, then our eye level is on the HL. If OUR eye level is on the HL, then where is everyone else's? Yes, on the HL. The HL should cross their eyes too, all of them.
I did a paintover. She doesn't read as well against the BG now...so maybe some light smoke/fog behind her?
Also: lack of structure to the figures;
neutral gray is not a color;
the girl's suit looks painted on or glued to the body;
big boobs do not a picture make;
perspective should be constructed, not guessed separately for every object;
it's hard to hold a 20-pound machine gun in balance with two fingers;
and yes, what's the point of the chainmail bikini?
First of all, wow, thanks for for the critiques, really!
Quigleyer: Oh yes, my bad for not planning. And I paid the price for it all, really. T^T
Artfix: Thanks so much for the PO! Yup, I just learned that it's good to keep sharing constructive feedback with my fellow classmates. We've been rather...conservative with critiquing one another in the past. Maybe it's part of being in an Asian country? O.o
And yes, we were taught perspective earlier, 2-point, 3-point, vanishing points and eye pathways and all. It's my own fault for not applying them to my work, and I do thank you for pointing out everything in the paintover.
Sorry, but I didn't really catch what you meant by her not reading as well with the BG. Do you mean by her not really being in focus?
arenhaus: Well, the boobs were part of the running joke (but not at all necessary, right? XD) And the 2-fingered handling of the gun was my fault as I photo-referenced myself holding a shamefully light BB shotgun. Oh well. == Thanks for the critique, though!
Great ciritique so far - I would only add two things - no one would rest the weight of their rifle on their scope (at least not where I was raised) and check out Loomis "Successful Drawing" for some excellent material on perspective.
EmiPark: I didn't draw it up to scale with the girl -length and weight-wise- so yeah, it's my fault for making the gun seem like it's made out of cardboard.
Thanks for the crit!
JeffX99: Didn't consider that bit about the scope earlier, should've rectified during the pencil sketches...thanks for pointing that out! =) As for Loomis' "Successful Drawing", yes, I do have it, in e-book format. I've only been skimming through it and not really sit down for a few good hours to study the book, so yeah, now I have a reason to. Thanks so much for the advice!