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Hi, I am getting a bit stuck on this piece. Would you mind sharing your thoughts on what is it definitely lacking at the first sight? I quite like the colour scheme but I thinkg it's a little all over the place now. Also, with the vampire chick, I was going for furious but steady and focus at the same time with regards to her stance. I did not want her in a clearly fighint pose but my wife's just accused me of the character being too generic so I decided to bounce it off ya fellas as I might be reading a little too much into it
Fellas, eh? Some of us have bouncy bags higher up, yanno.
What immediately strikes me is her pose does not match her facial expression, at all. I think it's her mouth throwing me off; focus means not really any outward rage. I mean, it looks like to me she is about to fight off some werewolves, and you want her to be contemplating how she's gonna throw down, but show some slight anger.
I think she needs to be in some fighting pose. I would expect someone with magic, or divine power, to be holding a serene stance like that before battle (meh, Jedi/Dark Side type people would be like that too, but they are using a metaphor of magic.). It just feels really unnatural to me. I like her eyes though, I think you've captured something there.
And the color scheme, it all feels a bit too bright to me considering the circumstances.
Hope that helps. ^^
I agree with xerenity, the pose don't work... and it's too boring anyway...
I have an eye for anatomy flaws but even without that, the fact her thigh is MUCH wider than her waist jumps at me... I doubt a proper ribcage and a pelvis could fit into her tiny torso and she may be a vampirelle with not quite human proportions, that can't change this.
The flow of her hair seems to be too difficult and illogical to me but even if I'm right, it's a minor thing, her anatomy is way more serious issue here.
Her waist is so thin it would probably break under the weight of her gigantoboobs
Overall composition is cool though. IMO getting ref for the figure and redoing it would improve this a lot. If you want to show the vapmchick is about to fight those beasts to the death her pose should reflect it though. Like keeping them in check with the swords or stuff like that. Right now she could have a "who got the nicest fangs contest" with them while holding swords in her hand for extra style rating.
You really do need to reference more, I think. The face especially doesn't look threatening at all, since it isn't structured like a real face. Her mouth, for instance, has more in common with a lamprey eel than anything with a jaw. You should be looking more at animals snarling, or humans with aggressive expressions (such as vapour's userpic, now that I think of it). Pay attention to how features such as brow, nose and lips break the silhouette, and how the jaw sits. These, as well as the angle of the head itself, make a big difference in whether your character looks aggressive or passive.
Similarly, pose references would help avoid the "just standing there" look you've got going on now, as well as hopefully avoid some of the anatomical problems (wasp waist, lack of ribcage, huge thigh, etc.). Part of the "generic" look comes from this. Once you start throwing in variation, motion and so forth, then the piece becomes more your own.
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Yep, I like that.. If you want to show the vapmchick is about to fight those beasts to the death her pose should reflect it though. Like keeping them in check with the swords or stuff like that. Right now she could have a "who got the nicest fangs contest" with them while holding swords in her hand for extra style rating.
As for the atmosphere, maybe make the image darker (as xerenity mentioned already) and add some rays of moonlight coming through the tree branches and maybe hitting the vamp and some of the weres also?
Hi, I have to agree with what is being said here. Her body could certainly use some refinement with some good use of reference. To me, it all seems to be the same tone. No lights to darks, no saturation to de-saturation (if that makes sense). I'd work on defining the image over all, staying at a good distance in able to see the entire canvas, gradually working in the details and colour to bring the viewer's eye to your focal point. (which is her face presumably?)
I really like the background and think that you should just about leave it as is. Maybe some minute details and blur's but mostly it's just about there. Your creatures need to pop more maybe? Someone suggested darkening the piece. Indeed do so, but there's different ways you can achieve this. Perhaps by using shadows to help create the mood of the piece. Perhaps some tree's in the froground casting the shadow's of leaves onto the open area where they all stand? It's a great start!
Gosh, I forgot completely about this one.
Thank you very much for your comments, fellas....err... ladies and gents
These are ones from the next stages, where I started complicating it for myself before I realized that the whole setup is, in fact a little boring and sort of given up on the whole but I coming back to it now.
You'll find that the anatomy issues are still there cos I hardly touched it. got stuck up in detail and could not see wood for the trees...
Ended up loosing the anger from her face and replacing it with a smirk, trying to add some interest to it by adding the hoods across the other side of the river - some kind of survival test, trial...
I think I watered it down, though...
My apologies, Xerenity... I use fellas quite liberally, referring to both genders - I will stop now, the silly illiterate foreigner that I am
"Bouncy Bags higher up" - ha ha ha - nice one Cheers!
well to me, her lower half of the body is larger then the upper. I like the intensity of her face in the first image. Her waist, seems to be super thin. Also, wolves need to be more realistic, their anatomy is off. Also, I like the forest better. Second one, looks like they are fighting in her backyard or something.
Thanks Damjan and S_Gangl, I will take care of her disproportional body. I am feeling really silly now about posting it without sorting it out, but hey - WiP, right?
As to Werewolves - my idea was to show them in different stages of transformation. It might have all started as a fairly civilized palaver between them, but then the red lights went on type of thing. I understand that doesn't read clearly so will have to rethink that.
As to them not looking like werewolves... really? What happened to a little artistic freedom and own interpretation? I will unify them, sure but I am planning to keep them pretty much as they look now...
I prefer the snarl version(JMO)
The anatomy has already been mentioned so I won't repeat any comments on it.
She is very static, her hips and shoulders are on the same plane, she could be turning more towards us - you'd have to alter her leg position to compensate though.
For the werewolves - design them how you want I'd say, as long as people can still tell they're wolves go for it (I quite like the weird gorilla like versions in the first version )
Compositionally I think they are to similar - especially the 2 in the back, you might want to alter their heights.
She could be standing over the corpses of some werewolves she'd already killed and the rest of the pack have turned up perhaps?
I do find it odd that they're in daylight though?
Keep going and next time sort it all out before you start applying paint, it's so much easier!
Last edited by Venger; December 5th, 2010 at 02:42 AM.
Thanks, Venger - great tips! I want to stick to daylight so perhaps I might need to say g'bye to werewolves as we know them. I think putting one already slain would add more to the story, I just need to figure out how to position it so it doesn't get too crowded in there... I'll get to work, I got my excitement about this piece back on.
I like the snarl version, but not the last one, on the last one I think too much got taken away and dont get rid of the forest scene, that was very attractive..the new fence thing is not really working out -imo
its a good painting, keep pushing it!
"Be who you are and say what you feel,because those that mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind."-Dr. Seuss
Thanks Alfaro. I am running behind with a challenge for the Artorder so putting my focus there, but will definitely get to it soon as I am done. I can clearly see now that I lost a lot of atmosphere when loosing the forest background. Cheers!