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|Color and Light||1.1||Do Assignment|
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|Illusion of Space and Atmosphere||1||Do Assignment|
|Personal Art||1.1||Do Assignment|
Composition: Maybe experiment with adding a bit of space over the top border.
What's going on in the mind of the characters doesn't read clearly.
Is the sitting one surprised? benevolent? Is the standing one afraid? cold?
Anatomy and perspective: The sitting one has a very short arm.
The legs seem seen from above, but I think the far leg should be lower.
(I'll start my new SB in a few days when I have something to show ^^)
Couple anatomy bugs are... bugging me: Left's arms appear to be much too small and right's legs are too short. We shouldn't be able to see so much of the left girl's trachea either, make her sternocleidomastoid muscle larger. The horizon also seems too low.
In any case, nice work. I like LD9_4 in particular.
Hi! You commented on my sb, so I thought I'd return the favor.
I really love the addition of yellow in your latest piece; it's basically a monochrome painting, except for that joyous touch of lemon in the sky/light. The figures are lovely. The only problem I have that's really bugging me is the undersides of the sitting ladies (I think the girl on the right is sitting?). When a person sits (esp. a woman, who generally has more padding down there), all the fat gets flattened onto the surface on which they are sitting. Right now, their bottoms look a little too shapeless.. maybe flatten them a bit on the bottom of the thighs and add some meat to the sides (the fat that sort of piles up on the sides when one is sitting). All in all, though, I think the composition is pretty much spot-on.. all other problems have already been addressed by other people.
Hope that helped!
Check out my sketchbook? updated 02.01
Thanks for the crits guys! I'm trying to keep them all in mind as I continue developing this one..
Leo - I have a specific interaction that I want to be conveyed for the characters, but yeah at the moment that's not really coming across. Basically the standing girl has come to seek a resolution with the sitting one, but the sitting one's still upset or whatever. So I want the scene to be very cold and somber, etc.
Zweit - I consistently have problems with the horizon, so thank you for that. I think I'm gonna go do that now before I forget.
Psypomp - No she's standing but that was a last-minute tack-on; hopefully she looks better now. I plan on adding a bit of purple for shadows (I always do ) and I'll try to push the yellow a bit now that you mention how monocrome (or analogous) it is. Thanks for stopping by ^^
Some more figures and attempted thumbs. Working out the one with the 2 girls, focusing on the figures first.
wip9 is gorgeous! Did you use reference(s)? The expression seems to match well the feeling you said you want to convey.
The hand is a little weird, it looks like the palm/back of the hand is tiny. Maybe the fifth finger goes up a wee bit too far.
You're not done with the rock of course, but just in case: a thin line of very dark shadow would probably help where she sits.
I like the stylized face of the sitting one on wip6.
The standing one's hip looks weird. The femur should attach more to the outside I think.
The face on mermaid1 is great, very intriguing...
Is mermaid2 a rescue from the water depths?
I like the view angle on mermaid3, but I don't understand what's happening.
On med2 the magical light looks darker than the skin, which puts it down.
summoner3's hips and legs need some attention, but I like the expression. What's the story behind it?
Waiting for the next update!
The latest iteration is a massive improvement on all fronts. Apart from her hand, as Leo mentioned, I can't think of much to crit at the moment. I'd like to give some tips on perspective but my comp's giving me fits lately so I'll have to do it later.
Cheers, great work.
Leo - Yeah I'm shooting refs for this stuff, once I have some solid thumbs. For LoI, I shot some initial photos that I used to makes wip6, but the sitting figure in that version is very static and unemotive so I went back and shot some new ones, diverting from the pose in the thumb to get more motion and emotion. I've been having some trouble visualizing the mermaid's scene, which is why it doesn't make any sense. I wanted to illustrate the end the of the little mermaid (the original story) where her sisters come and tell her to kill the prince and return to the sea. She can't bring herself to do it, so she drowns herself at sunrise. In my piece, the sisters find her and mourn for her. So I think I want the piece to be angled down on her face and have the sisters framing the composition, but I'm having trouble getting that on paper. And the summoner one is just some girl that can summon dragons.. yeah. And yeah her body's uber weird; I'm still figuring out her pose and what props she's going to have with her.
Zweit - Thanks I'll be sure to address the hand issue. Perspective help would be great; it's an area I've highly neglected in terms of study. I've done one and 2 point perspective but I haven't heard much about placing a figure in a believable 3d environment.
Um small update on the blue girls. I've mostly been working on the standing girl and tinkering with the bg/composition. She still needs some work (primarily on the face, arm, and edges). I feel like her torso is too short or at least the upper back? (Any comments on that would be great.) Haven't touched the sitting one at all (will definitely pay more attention to the hand to address those crits). I'm not going to deal with color until I have the values pretty finalized.
Wow, you blow my mind with such a quality of polishing!
I have no crit at this point, only some things to keep in mind for the next stages:
-keeping the lighting from the sky consistent throughout
-tints from water reflection
-the very particular geometry of the reflections (not a simple vertical flip)
You probably didn't need me to remind you of these, it's just in case
Leo - Thanks, I'll definitely keep that stuff in mind. I really want to work on making the figures feel like they belong in the environment, so I really appreciate the reflected color tip. (I always forget about that kind of stuff.)
Whistler - Thanks, I'm glad you like their curves
Elf - Yeah, I know, I should try to work in some lifedrawing studies, at least once a week.
Hookay, taking a break from the blue girls to do something for the gender TD over in the challenge area. Pretty meh about this piece atm; I wasn't able to find a composition that I liked and eventually just had to get started on it anyway to be able to finish on time. Going to try work the figure on the right before I work on the contrast and add in the colors. The scene is 2 pirates that jumped off their sinking ship and swam to shore. The lying one is supposed to be dying
yeah girls starting to look really good! like them. also like the blue colors maybe you an try to loosen it up a bit by mixing in some greens and violets just to make it more vivid?!
Sketchbook (daily Oils):
Zweit - Sweet! Not exactly the character I was going for, but I can live with Emmett Kelly
Ran outta time; this was as far as I got. My biggest issue with this piece, besides the composition, is that the ground plane isn't describing the perspective and sense of space very well. I had intended to work on the sand a lot more than time allowed.
Warning: harsh critique coming
You've put a lot of good work in the details like the clothes, the hands, but...
at the sketch stage something went wrong with perspective and volume, and remained until the last stage.
The lying guy's trunk and legs look flat, his forearm seems like a paint on his shirt. The problem comes in part from the perspective, in part from the shading/volume.
I know the deadline's over, but I think it would be a very good training to pick up the work from the beginning - only as grayscale sketches.
The crouching guy's mostly perfect, the lying one is the one that needs complete rethink in my view.
I hope I don't sound completely unsympathetic
Edit: Also, the focus points of this picture are the hands clutching and the face of the dying man;
when working in a limited time it may be better to start polishing the focus, and leave the rest sketchy if time runs out.
Last edited by Leo Ki; March 2nd, 2009 at 10:18 PM.
Serio - Hey thanks man.
wilkerson - Yeah the background doesn't even look like anything, just a big brown blur
Leo - Yeah a few people have expressed that the lying figure's perspective appears off. I'm not going to start over on that figure; I don't like the concept enough to put the time into that. But I do hope to get back in there and pull it together a little since I have so few pieces that portray men or multiple figures interacting, and this piece happens to have both. I'm happy that I took the time to work out the clothing first because the way clothing folds to the human figure is something I need a lot more practice with, and this was a good study in that regard.
I went back to work on that one centaur piece that I started a year ago and have come to hate dreadfully. The figure really bugs me all over, so I decided to give her a new face and change her pose a bit. Now she's a renaissance minstrel, with a lute. Huzzah for lutes.
The brotherhood pic really turned out well, in spite of the aforementioned hiccups. Great job there.
I like the centaur with the lute. It works best in the context of the pose, and it's a bit more interesting than a spear or staff. ;p Watch her forelegs though. They need more meat on those haunches.
Dierat, please don't feel discouraged! My critique was harsh because I know you are able to do better.
The minstrel is yummy. I liked the former face as well!
Try to conserve the way you are texturing the fur, the skin, the grass, not forcing too much crispness of detail, it's more poetic that way I think.
The foreleg elbow on the left seems not to be touching the ground, but I'm not sure why.
The landscape background is going a good way too. I can't wait to see how you'll make the sky.
Keep it up, you can! Hugzzzz!
damn that some crisp rendering.
The centaur is coming along nicely.
Leo - Tbh I didn't think your crit was very harsh. I was just a bit disappointed in how my image turned out, and my inspiration kinda shriveled up for a few days. For the centaur piece, I've rendered the face pretty tightly so I'm going to have to stick with that for consistency. But I never mess with skin or short fur texture because that level of detail (imo) can flatten the image (we shouldn't be able to see that level of detail at this distance from the figure). I think the elbow problem you mentioned is due to inconsistent lighting on the cloth underneath it. Which I'll hopefully get to when I work on the horse, thanks for that crit.
Long time, no post. I've been putting off working on the hands on this one, so I need to get past that if I want to make any decent progress. So, small update - got the lower hand worked out and tinkered with the composition to make her more centered and make the dimensions more rectangular.
I think you are making great strides. The forshortening on the hind right leg looks a bit off, but I know you are not finished and when you get to that you will address it. I can't wait to see the finished product.
Comparing her sketched right hand and her polished left hand is like comparing a pebble and a planet with all the geography!
And the shadow adds to the realism enormously.
Maybe leak some hue between the hand and the mandolin.
Looks like you put alot of effort in smoothing out your work.
That really shows some dedication, which is always nice to see!
(note to self put more effort in what you do! )
Im curious how this last picture looks when ur finished..
Keep up the good work!